Wanted: Munnabhai MBA!

This post is all about the MBA grads fresh out of their colleges.. These people join some organisation and immediately start counting the days till the CEO seat is goanna be offered to them.. However the reality teaches them that it isn’t a fancy ramp walk and puts them in place. However till they get back to reality they are afflicted by a disease called “I-am-neo”! During this phase you can observe many characteristics among which there is one I want to write in detail about…

Grade x,y,tom,dick and harry syndrome: During this phase they would find fellow MBAs from other institutes and based in order of insti ranking, CGPA, technical knowledge (which is normally rare to find among this breed) and other knowledge exhibited due to another disease acquired during MBA called “keep-moving-your-mouth” (lips, tongue and deep inside unto base!). This is an on-going process until groups are established and lines are drawn clearly. Recently I receive a mail from a fella MBA saying, “you can subscribe to a yahoogroups called MBAS-OrgnName@yahoogroups.com. This would help you to keep in touch with the fella Biz mangers, oops, managers and find opportunities in other groups and divisions earlier (read that as before the organisation knows about it) informally. Also you can pass on this group id to other mbas you know of. Make sure the B-grade insti students aren’t invited. This is not because we want to discriminate but you know…”. What the hell does this mail do other than the ample loads of one thing – discrimination! Gawd.. First forming a group among MBAs to establish them bigger than the non-MBAs, next discriminating among MBAs and more importantly filtering and manipulating with organizational information (openings in a division etc). I also see that among the so-called premier MBA-ites, there is a cold (read HOT) war between batches (based on year of passing) based on the salary offered. Some juniors getting higher money than seniors etc. Many a confusion arising bcoz of this - quitting, re-joining etc etc.

Another popular syndrome being “I-am-present” or “Class Participation” syndrome, which gets inculcated during one’s insti and carries over to workplace. Ppl afflicted with this keep doing things just to catch others’ attention and in the process gathering many a ppl’s irritation too… e.g.: forwarding some weblinks (useful and not so) to entire organisation or biz group, replying to all on some meaningless mail exhbiting one’s english knowledge (you shouldn’t expect substance in these mails) and so on.. There are many other syndromes which I would rather not write about.

Why do not these fresh biz managers realise that there is something to look forward to in life beyond power, money and credits! Why do not MBAs treat other ppl as just normal beings and behave normally. The cut throat competition in getting into premier instis and inside the instis has actually made MBA-ites as walking robots programmed on money, career and accreditations.. Hope and wish a Munnabhai MBA comes out spreading the essence of life to MBAs as well just like he did to doctors! (Come on, sanjay dutt, kamalhassan, chiranjeevigaru and uppidada - you all can pull it off in respective languages!)